The end of the past

This is the first post of my new blog. Well , i read through my old blog's posts, a lot of memories got back in my head, and i realized i were not mature enough. I might have hurt people unintentionally with my words , actions or whatever. Many things happened a few years ago, and i think there was a little too much for me to handle, so i collapsed. It was a hard time for me , i mean extremely tough. and i got some points from those incidents .

Power is such a horrible thing. Even the innocent people fell for it. Because we all know how it feels - powerless .
Jealousy is scary. When we jealous, that's the time when demon starts to control us, and we starts doing wrong things , hurting people we loved.
So , this is society, this is reality. We just happened to know it earlier. In front of power and jealousy, friendship means nothing. Or just may be, that's not true friendship.

There are many things I've sacrifice for it, for those people i loved. and i just ended up torturing myself. living in grief. Finally i chose to let go, let those people i thought were important get out of my life. Not to care for them anymore , just to care about myself , my happiness . Im not saying that im a selfless , kind people.In fact i think im not. Just i really did all my best i could do for them. hmm...that time. Eventually , all the emotions exploded .

Im done playing nice. Why should i just live like this , keep on getting backstabs by the hypocritical , double-faced bitch, just to care those people's feeling , to keep the peace of the group. And another reason i were no fighting back was, i care about that bitch too.
i not in charged of the peace. These people should just get the hell out of my life. So , i leaved .

Actually , if you ask if im happy of this decision . I would tell you , im not . The pains were still there. But , it feels better.

It really took a long time for me to get through all these pain. and there are some people i would like to thank. (will mention it in the upcoming post)

I thought i will never forgive those people, but lastly i did forgive. Forgiving is not for them , its for myself. And , perhaps i hurt other's feeling at first , so these were my retribution. So , i paid back . i didn't owe you anymore. we have to move on , whatever is it , its not important anymore. There are always something that we can't fix it , can't change it. So , just let it be.
Anyway, i love those moments that made me smile no matter what is happening right now.

Okay , next post we gonna talk about emotions. This post seems to be too long haha.